What to Ask the Doctor at a Dementia Diagnosis: A Practical Checklist

Sitting in that appointment, it's easy to go completely blank. You've been waiting weeks or months for this moment, and now you're in the room, the questions you'd been turning over on the drive there seem to disappear the second the doctor starts talking.

That's completely normal, and it's exactly why it helps to write your questions down beforehand rather than trust yourself to remember them on the day. Here's a practical list to take with you, built around what specialists say actually helps families get the most from these appointments.

Before You Even Get There

A few small things make the appointment itself go better:

• Ask for a longer appointment when you book, if you think you'll need more time or your loved one may need extra time to process and respond.
• Take someone with you. A second person notices things the other misses and can help fill in gaps afterwards when you're comparing notes.
• Write down the symptoms you've noticed, when they started, and how they've changed. Include specific examples and incidents, not just general impressions, they're more useful to the doctor than "he's been a bit forgetful."
• List current medications, including anything bought over the counter or herbal remedies, since these can affect symptoms too.
• Note any family history of dementia or similar conditions, if you know of any.

Questions About the Diagnosis Itself

• What type of dementia is this, or is it not yet clear?
• How confident are you in this diagnosis, and is further testing needed to confirm it?
• What tests or scans led you to this conclusion?
• Could this be something else, and how was that ruled out?

Questions About What Happens Next

• Will we be referred to a memory clinic or specialist team, and how long is that likely to take?
• Will there be a named contact, such as an Admiral Nurse or key worker, we can go to with questions between appointments?
• What does a typical post-diagnostic support plan look like, and who puts it together?
• What local services or support groups would you recommend?

Questions About Progression and What to Expect

• How does this type of dementia typically progress, and how quickly?
• What changes should we watch for that would mean it's time to review the care arrangements?
• Is it too early to talk about this, or is it worth doing so now while we can plan calmly?

Questions About Treatment and Medication

• Is medication appropriate here, and what would it actually do, slow progression, manage symptoms, or both?
• What are the possible side effects, and what should we watch for?
• Are there any clinical trials or newer treatments that might be relevant?
• Who do we contact if a prescribed medication doesn't seem to be helping, or seems to be causing problems?

Practical Questions Worth Asking Early

• Should we be thinking about Lasting Power of Attorney now, while capacity is still clear?
• Is my loved one still safe to drive, and who makes that assessment?
• Are there financial or benefits entitlements we should look into?

We've covered the legal side of this in detail in our Wills, LPAs and Deputyship guide, and what typically comes next after diagnosis in our Dementia Diagnosis: What Happens Next guide.

It's Fine Not to Get Every Answer at Once

Diagnosis is often a process spread across several appointments, not one conversation that answers everything. If the doctor can't answer something on the day, it's completely reasonable to ask what happens next and roughly when you'll hear more. Bring your list, but don't feel you have to get through all of it in one sitting, the most important thing is walking out knowing what happens next and who to contact if you're worried.

You don’t have to navigate it alone.